Women's Clothes, Part 1

For All the Guys Who have Wondered how Women’s Clothes are Sized, Part 1

In 1982, very shortly after Martie (my wife) and I were married, I was going to the Sock Shoppe, in Griffin, GA, to buy some socks and underwear for myself. My lovely bride asked that her loving husband buy her three pairs of panties...cotton...full cut briefs. No problem. Because I knew her dress size (we had gone shopping and I remembered her dress size), I did not pay attention to what size panty she told me to get. After all, women's clothes were sized consistently like men's sizes, right?

Well, I proudly walked up to the lingerie counter and waited my turn. This dear, sweet grandmother type asked if she could help me. "Yes ma’am. I need to get my wife three pairs of panties...cotton...full cut briefs." Then she had to ask the question that would ultimately be my doom, "What size, young man?"

"I believe size eleven. Yes that's it. Size eleven."

"Are you sure," she asked quizzingly. "Yes ma’am, size eleven."

"Son (this is where I began to realize I might be in trouble), what size is your wife?"

"She is about five-foot, four inches tall and weighs about 125 pounds. She wears a size 11/12 dress."

"Son (she said it again), I don't believe she wears a size eleven panty. Are you real sure she told you size eleven, not size seven?"

"Oh, I'm sure it's not a seven. Yep, she said eleven."

"Oh kaaaay, but I think you are mistaken, young man," she replied. With that said, she reached under the counter and pulled out a pair of size eleven’s. She unfolded them three or four times (at this point, I was in serious doubt of my surety of size). Then she held up this boat sail (picture my arms spread open with my hands approximately three feet apart). "Son, are you positive this is the size your wife wears?''

"NO MAAM. She does not wear that size. Me and her both could get in those and have room left over. I do not know what size she wears. Evidently you women don't size things the way men do; size 42 pants and size 42 boxer shorts are the same. My wife will have to come buy her own panties cause I ain't even gonna try to take home the size seven. There's more than four numbers difference between what she wears and those. Uh, huh, no way, she can buy her own."

"Would there be anything else, Sir?"

"No, ma’am. Thank you."

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Still alive,
Terry Hawkins